Renowned Ghanaian counsellor, Counsellor Frank Edem Adofoli has shared a piece of advice to all ladies on his social media handles.
The advice is about ladies not forcing their fiancees to give them what they don’t see in them adding that it is pointless.
He made this known in a recent post which he titled, ‘ARE YOU IN LOVE OR IN A MESS?’
Read the full post below;
“ARE YOU IN LOVE OR IN A MESS?
Is the title for Today’s Motivational Message
Written by Counselor Adofoli
Falling in love with someone who has no plans of catching you or being there for you can really make one’s life messy. The one who doesn’t love you makes you feel unwanted, they make you feel lonelier and more desperate at times. That’s why some ladies play hard to get for they believe if she is easy to get, she won’t be worthy or respected. He might as well leave easily, while some do that to avoid getting hurt or messed up.
But sometimes women mistaken attraction for love. The way the man looks at her makes her believe he is in love with her, which is not always true. Men will stand with you because you are pretty but they don’t fall in love with you because you are pretty. In the same way, they can go to bed with you because they find you pretty and not because they have fallen in love with you.
A man can give you attention because he finds you attractive not because he is in love with you. That is why it is easy for him to move from one woman to another, there is a greater chance he will find a new woman prettier than you or be more attracted to her than to you. Some men are like the bee, they just move from one flower to another. They do that until they fall in love.
You cannot expect a man who is only attracted to you to be loyal or faithful to you. You can’t expect a man who only finds you attractive to marry you. Yes, you are pretty but that is not enough for him to get married to you. You can be the prettiest in his life yet not be his woman or wife or a woman he wants to settle down with as a spouse or wife.
A man falls in love with you by getting to know you. When he gets to know your mind, how intelligent you are, he will stay connected to you. When he gets to know your heart, if it’s a kind one, he falls in love with it. And if he falls in love with you, he does not care how many women there are in the world, how prettier they may be, he just wants you, he wants to be with you, he wants to spend the rest of his life with you.
Many at times, it is hard or difficult for a lady to know whether the man loves her or he is just messing up with her. This happens especially when she has fallen in love with him. Every human being is just like an ingredient, it requires you study them before doing whatever you want to do with them. Be it friendship, relationship or business, get to know him as a friend first, get into his mind, get to know what he thinks about you. Get to know who you are to him before you conclude you have found your man.
If he sees you as his woman, he will invest into you, not just enjoy your company or have fun with you. He makes it a goal to help you look more beautiful instead of looking for beauty outside. If he loves you, you have a special place in his heart, you don’t need to compete. He respects you, even how he touches you has nothing to do with sex but rather offers a hand for comfort and protection. He is constantly learning about you, just to understand you.
Ladies need to stop forcing men to do things to please them. Such acts don’t speak love. The reason why he is not giving you the needed attention is because he doesn’t love you. The reason why he is not willing to give to you or provide for you, listen to you or be sensitive to you is because he doesn’t love you. That’s why he doesn’t seem to care about your welfare and wellbeing, what you do, your plans, etc.
It’s pointless forcing him to give you what he doesn’t see in you. Asking him to call you is like forcing him to love you. A man who loves you does not send you mixed signals, for once he gets to know you, he knows your place in his life and can’t lie about that or play with that.
In conclusion, “The teaching of the wise is a source of life; their words will save you from deadly traps” – Proverbs 13:14 (ERV).”