American singer Lady Gaga has publicly spoken about one of the darkest moments in her career.
According to Gaga, she was raped at 19 by a music producer and it took a toll on her mental health following abuse from the producer. She was engaged in an emotional interview on The Me You Can’t See on Apple TV+ where she spilled it all.
In her words: “They didn’t stop asking me, and then I just froze, and I just – I don’t even remember.
“I do not ever want to face that person again. And then I was sick for weeks and weeks after.
“First I felt full-on pain, then I went numb. I realized it was the same pain I felt when the person who raped me dropped me off pregnant on the corner, at my parents’ house, because I was vomiting and sick. Because I was being abused. I was locked away in a studio for months.
“I had a total psychotic break, and for a couple years, I was not the same girl. Even if I have six brilliant months, all it takes is getting triggered once to feel bad.
“And when I say I feel bad, I mean I want to cut. Think about dying. Wondering if I’m ever going to do it. I learned all the ways to pull myself out of it.
“What’s so interesting is the line I walk, feeling like I wanna cut myself and feeling like I don’t, are actually real close together.
“Everybody thinks it’s gotta be a straight line, that it’s like every other virus, that you get sick and then you get cured. It’s not like that. It’s just not like that. And actually, I think that traps people.
“I don’t tell this story for my own self-service, because, to be honest, it’s hard to tell.
“I feel a lot of shame about it. How do I explain to people that I have privilege, I’ve got money, I’ve got power, and I’m miserable? How do you do that? I’m not here to tell my story to you because I want anybody to cry for me. I’m good. But open your heart up for somebody else. Because I’m telling you, I’ve been through it and people need help. So, that’s part of my healing, being able to talk to you.” she added.
